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Sunday, March 4, 2012

Is Online Dating Right For You? A Guest Post

Author Bio: Tonya Vrba is a passionate writer. Her work has been published in newspapers and blogs. She writes frequently about health, career and dating issues. Tonya currently writes with Online Dating Sites. Learn more about her work at her personal website.

Is Online Dating Right For You?

The days of dating online being taboo are gone. People today may live fast paced lives, but many still hope to fall in love at some point in their life. Don’t let the seemingly simple process fool you. Finding love online is not as simple as ordering a pizza. More often than not, the same traditional dating rules apply. When deciding if online dating is the answer for your love life, first ask yourself these questions.

1. Are you ready to date? Plenty of blogs and television shows love to tell people why they are still single. The truth of the matter is, if you’re not attractive offline, you won’t be online either. Eventually, you will have to take your online romance offline. If you are overly needy or still holding onto grudges of past lovers, a new relationship will not work. If you are not emotionally available, that will come across in the emails you send online. Make sure you are ready and open to love.

2. What do you want out of a relationship? This is very important. Different dating sites offer different relationships. EHarmony, for example, is known for the number of marriages it has created. The site only allows you to view people with whom you have the chance of creating a long relationship with. Match.com allows you to see all its members and explore people who may be a bit different from you. Other niche sites cater to specific types of people. A great example of this is a site called Rainbow Christians, a site for Christians in the LGBT community. If you are just looking for sex or want something more, there is a site out there. There’s no point in browsing through them all. You only need to look at the ones which are specific to your taste.

3. Why are you looking into online dating? The usual excuse is that people are too busy to date. Yet, relationships take time. That excuse is not enough. You need to establish what you want to be different about online dating because the truth is online dating is much the same as any other kind of dating. Here are some good examples:

a. A person who is older or recently divorced may have trouble finding singles in their age group and seek online dating as an easy way to find them.

b. A person may have a specific relationship requirement, like not wanting kids or waiting until marriage to have sex. Online, you don’t have to bother with people who don’t want the same kind of relationship you do.

c. A person may be tired of the bar scene but not know where else to find singles.

d. A person with a full-time job may not have the time or money to stay out late at night.

4. What are you willing to pay? There are free dating sites out there. Plenty of Fish is one of the more popular free dating sites. At the end of the day, dating sites are like any other product. You get what you pay for. Even when you pay for a dating site, it is often cheaper than traditional dating. Imagine you meet someone at a bar. You buy them a few drinks (10$) and invite them to dinner in a few days. Even if you only pay for own meal and drink (15-20$), the numbers add up. In this example, you have spent 25-30$ on the chance the person might like you. If they don’t, it’s on to the next date with someone new. Most dating sites cost less per month than one date. If you are one who has paid for countless dates and is still alone, online dating may save you money. After all, the people who are willing to meet you offline, will already be genuinely interested in a relationship.

5. Have you done your research? Following the above steps, you have probably narrowed it down to a few prospective dating sites. Now, it’s as simple as typing in ________.com reviews. The best information can usually be found in forums, where there is an ongoing conversation. There, you will find people who both approve and disapprove of the dating site. This will help you make a well rounded decision. Also take a look at reviews on blogs and websites that go into detail about the features a dating site offers. This will help you come to final conclusion of which dating site is right for you.

At the end of the day, remember the goal of online dating is to emulate offline dating. Online dating will not solve all problems. Online dating will not make you grow or mature. It’s won’t mend your broken heart or hand you a relationship that involves no work. The goal of online dating and those who take part in it is to have a successful offline relationship.

Thank you Tanya for your excellent post on a topic that many older readers are absolutely clueless about. Your common sense overview and advice are direct and to the point. Nice job!

1 comment:

african woman said...

I do agree with you. Dating sites nowadays keeps increasing and I find it a convenient way to find someone easily. It's our own hard work to met our desired men. Though dating sites will really help you it's you who will decide who you really want to be.

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